Understanding the Common Causes of Marital Stress Conflict & How to Resolve Them

People marry expecting a lifetime companion and partner; however, sometimes marriages do not sail smoothly. Knowing these strategic conflicts that are likely to cause marital misunderstanding is crucial in ensuring that both partners are ready to negotiate the issues in order to avoid and reduce marital conflict. Here the blog considers the underlying reasons for marital disagreements and offers helpful tips on how to address these issues.

Communication Breakdown

The inability to determine the meaning of the messages transmitted and to decipher them correctly may lead to the appearance of a conflict in a marriage, and this is the main type of conflict that exists in marriages. Such lapses as can be seen in misunderstandings, lack of listening, and not expressing feelings or needs are likely to bring a lot of disagreements between partners. This essentially means that when two people who are involved in a relationship do not find the right way of communicating, then little problems that may exist often turn out to be big issues. For example, one partner might feel deserted if the other does not frequently call or offer stories about themselves or their day. This feeling may become persistent and as a result people may feel lonely and resentful sometimes.

The actuality of the situation is that communication is one of the most important aspects that should be marital in the course of solving this problem. Dynamic listening whereby an individual listens without interrupting the other, it also ensures that each of the two partners is understood. However, paraphrasing what the other person has said also tends to give a confirmation that one has understood what was said or avoid misunderstanding. These are equally important; the ability to speak as well as express oneself appropriately. Avoid using accusatory words and instead focus on expressing what one feels by using ‘I’ assertions such as saying ‘I get offended when you don’t discuss what you did at work as you usually do saying ‘You never speak to me about what you do at work.’ This particular strategy fosters discussion and does not really invite mere reactions. Furthermore,; the proposed plan to schedule appointments to check up on each other will ensure that couples remain connected the common pointed-out issues are dealt with in their initial stage and not when they have worsened. It is preferable if these check-ins do not become routine but informal conversations where partners express their sentiments and experiences in the relationship. I have discovered that arrangements that prioritize communication help foster a significant basis of respect, thus cultivating a crucial ingredient important in marriage.

Financial Stress

With regard to conflict, couples usually experience more disputes over money issues. Any differences with regard to what to spend and how, what to save on, and how to save money in general can be a source of conflict in marriage. They also make people feel insecure and resentful People are already stressed due to financial difficulties. For example, when one spouse is a thrill-seeker regarding spending money whereas the other spouse is a saver it is possible to have battles over the handling of money. These disagreements results into a frequently arising conflict instigating a strain within the relation.

The ways in which funds are managed can also be significant in reducing tension if shared together. When couples establish a budget that considers the amounts of money received by each partner, expenditures, and the desired amount of money to be saved, it creates focus on the financial aspect. Decision-making concerning the financial aspect of the business is another benefit of a joint venture because both partners in this system are involved in the decision-making process and hence feel like they are both accountable. Transparency is also crucial. It should be to the point, honest, and preferably free from legal jargon regarding financial position, debts, and expenses. However, when it comes to money-related concerns, consulting an expert such as a financial consultant is highly recommended as one will get advice followed by a definite solution concerning the couple’s case in the event that the issues become unmanageable.

Coping with one’s finances is a continuous process and discussing it is healthy. It is essential that couples should make a habit of talking about their monetary plans and worries, in order to avoid an eruption of conflict. It is also necessary to be patient and rational, do not neglect the fact that financial behaviors and attitudes may be inborn and may requisite considerable time to change. Couples endure financial difficulties, and compromising and helping each other can develop financial solutions and deepen their relationship.

Differing Expectations and Intimacy Issues

This is because expectations not met usually result to discontentment and irritation in a marriage. These expectations may be about how a woman should look after her home, raise the children or the kind of work she should be doing. For instance, one-half of the couple might get the perception that the other half will help in most of the chores around the house, while the latter expects the former to share the responsibilities. Otherwise, it may lead to moderate to high levels of tension pegged on such discrepancies.

This knowledge will apply of course to the relationship between a man and a woman only if they are willing to talk about what they expect from each other from the relationship at hand early enough before any disagreements arise. Lack of discussion before starting a relationship matters returns couples to several questions and answers about expectations in different areas. This can give each partner a better understanding of the other and the overall value and direction that the partnership is moving. This summarises the bargaining power by stating that when conflict does arise, the best policy is to bargain and reach a middle ground. This can be particularly important in agreeing on the concept of compromise in marriage because it may make the two people feel that their needs are both being considered and addressed. This also entails good attitude that is embracing to change at some certain stages and also flexibility in achieving the set goals and objectives.

Well-being, which involves being affectionate, hugging, kissing, and other aspects of touch, is very vital to married couples. This paper posits that, when perpetual sexual closeness is absent, couples may feel estranged and, thereby, quarrel. For example, jealousy can be felt when one of the partners feels abandoned or not as valued as before as physical touches or appreciation are reduced. Intimacy is one of the most essential areas that should not be neglected thus helping your partner maintain close contact. This might mean designing a time when one partner can leave his or her work and spend quality time with the other, or it may involve performing minor intimate acts. There is also a need to engage in constructive communication, I mean; one is able to determine what the other person requires or wants and both can work towards fulfilling those requirements or wants. When there are problems with intimacy, you may get so focused on the problem that you fail to come up with working solutions on your own; thus one has to consult a therapist. A marriage counselor is an expert in the field of intimacy and can assist couples in understanding why they are struggling in this area and recommend ways through which they should increase the depth of this part of their relationship. Spending quality time, effort, and energy in maintaining intimacy means that individuals will achieve a healthy and satisfying relationship.


The moment two people commit to each other they know that they will have conflict but the conflict is not the relationship. While it is essential to define what the conflicts are and how they occur and how to solve them, it is crucial to state that every couple needs to know the common causes that lead to these clashes in order to find ways to strengthen the relations. Typically, identified inter partner disagreements fall under the following categories: Communication difficulties, financial pressures, differences in expectation, and relational conflicts relating to intimacy. Still, if partners practice attentive listening, open and honest communication, joint management of finances, and focus on sexual connection, they are capable of overcoming all these challenges.

A healthy marriage is one that is worked at, evolved, and reinforced by adequate and proper communication and the willingness to change. Couples would be able to avoid these issues and look for a solution to solve them as soon as possible in order to make the couple to overcome all the problems and make the relationship strong and healthy. It should be noted that marital conflict is not the same as family conflict, and it is important not to overstate the problem since the main values in solving it are respect, trust, and the desire to develop together.